
had the worst day at improv last night.
just couldn't get out of my head.
the worst part of it? my PMS/period is over, so there's no scapegoat.
(and i'm sure you wanted to know that. seriously, though. as much as women hate PMS and Mother Nature's unfailing drive to torment women and remind them of their womanhood and the real purpose of their unused, spinster eggs, PMS is always a great excuse for unabashedly serving people their just desserts.
but don't openly assume that we're PMSing, either.
that's about the only thing about women that i've come to fully understand and respect.)
that and my PMS might be going by a different name now.
and, until "PMS" grows a pair [ovaries, cojones - whichever you prefer] and finally decides to confront me (or, at least, take it), i'm just going to have to accept too-large quantities of chocolate as a regular part of my diet, Alanis, Janis, Patti, Joni, and other angry/moody/loud women as the current soundtrack for my life, and considering writing a sequel to Poor Poor Jimmie.
however, i digress.
the main point of this post is to outline new resolutions i've made for myself.
it's not exhaustive:
1. tell that one person that i'm sorry i panicked and backed out so randomly and quietly. start over. maybe by groveling.
2. be more unapologetic about my antics and [less weird] neuroses.
3. no more self-deprecation [unless it's in the service of comedy].
4. stop thinking so much. seriously. it's annoying.
5. be more frugal. that poster of Chunk doing the Truffle Shuffle really wasn't all that necessary.
6. okay. maybe it was.
7. i'm laughing just thinking about it.
8. stop thinking about PMS and don't let him get to you. definitely not worth it.
9. write, write, write. but don't try so hard.
10. be proactive.
it's already shaping up to be a really great year, i think.
plenty of stuff to keep me busy and happy.
and making money's always nice.
and new friends.
new interests.
newer and healthier habits.
good stuff.
feeling inspired.
oh-so inspired.
proof?
here are some story ideas i've been coming up with.
(but don't steal them. don't forget that i'm currently in a permanent state of PMS.):
1. shy, awkward girl meets equally shy, awkward boy.
go out on first shy, awkward outing.
bond in ways that would make Jack and Rose jealous.
(like my dad, i only like that movie for the special effects.)
but, to no fault of their own, they're both gay.
haha, God - nice one.
so they're gaybies together; both trying to find their niches in this big, gay world.
one les-bro, one fruit-fly.
but always mistaken for a couple.
they help each other out in finding a date to a big, gay prom (or something of the sort) and hilarity ensues.
their names might sound something like Lyle and Nicky.
(still to be decided.)
2. protagonist comes out as trans F to M in college, after finally escaping that conservative, rural town and the rule of his equally conservative and somewhat backward parents.
they excommunicate him for several years, during his transition period.
in the meantime, he struggles as a starving artist/performer type.
when he returns home to prep for his dad's final days, at the urge of his mother - who might be suffering from some degenerative disease or other and needs his help as both of his older, more successful sisters are far too overwhelmed to do so - after a 4 year silence, he's forced to confront the skeletons in his closet.
one night, inundated by the prospects of facing all of those skeletons at once, he goes out to a bar by himself.
there, he runs into another skeleton: his childhood best friend and secret love of his life, who he promised himself he'd never speak to or think about again.
as he's changed his name and, obviously, his appearance, his ex-best friend - who's attempting to escape her friends' belligerence - doesn't recognize him.
at a loss for words at her sudden appearance, but eager, nonetheless, to somehow be close to her, he sits and listens as she explains to him that she feels like she's known him before, but is also currently participating in a personal social experiment where she attempts to build significant relationships through beliefs and behaviors rather than personal histories.
she's inexplicably drawn to him and asks if they can meet again.
he considers telling her the complete truth - about how they really already knew one another - but, when he finally opens his mouth to do so, she cuts him off and reminds him of her social experiment.
he doesn't resist.
they meet, and keep meeting.
fall in love.
they never have sex - especially after one particularly painful and awkward near-sexual encounter in her apartment.
she somehow learns the truth (still have to figure this part out) and panics.
i still need to work out the ending.
as depressing as this one sounds, i've already jotted down a number of really potentially hilarious scenes that can balance it out.
namely, through the protagonist's mother.
3. this one's an idea for a TV show, inspired by the Tim Fite song, "Big Mistake."
the protagonist, a young-ish woman who was recently involved in a drunk driving accident, isn't dead.
but isn't completely alive, either.
she's in the in-between. a coma.
but she's not "inactive."
instead, her "spirit" (or something or other) is put into another body.
she's inserted into a different life where she has full access to her family, loved ones, and "enemies/acquaintances" - but they can't recognize her.
instead, she befriends others who are like herself, as they all manage to find one another in the in-between.
their task?
to correct (or at least acknowledge) the one big mistake they made in their lives thus far, so they can come to.
but if they fail - because there is an antagonist (who else, besides Death himself/herself?) who is hell-bent (wordplay!) on foiling their plans - they "move on."
a comedy.
and that's all i've got for now, but i really think it's more than enough.
gotta get to working.
also, any feedback would be great! anywho.
this is an odd and sudden way to end a blog.
1 comment:
i would definitely read a story about Lyle and Nicky.
the second one sounds incredible as well.
go forth and write so i can buy your books!
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