geeking out: part 1

i'm a Harry Potter nerd.

this isn't news.

...just a plain fact i'm sure anyone who knows me can attest to.

technically, i grew up with him: the first time i read the very first book i was just about to enter 6th grade (at age 11), and the final book came out just after i graduated from high school.

perfect.

the sad part of all of this is that, once the final book came out, Harry Potter releases became rarer events, and mugglenet.com's news flow was vastly reduced.

i know because i checked.

if i could answer the ice-breaking question of, "What's your favorite holiday?" with, "The final weeks leading up to a Harry Potter release," i totally would.

they're so exciting and fraught with tension and you're given free license to be as openly nerdy as you wish.

for a few short weeks you're reminded that you're not the only weenie on the face of the planet.

or the biggest.

(people who dress up give me the heebie jeebies.)

but more than that, it gives me an excuse to follow through with an age-old ritual of mine: re-reading the books that lead up to either the newest book release, or the newest film adaptation.

and i'm given the opportunity to relive all of the special moments that made me fall in love with each of the books in the first place.

it always irks me when people write the books off as lighter fare, or exclusively children's fiction, or nerdy fantasy (or a bible for Satanic witchcraft).

as i got to grow up with Harry, Ron, and Hermione, the books took on a totally different meaning; often capturing the very essence, not only of growing up, but what it means to grow up, and what it means to be, well, a muggle.

as, again, i'm still geeking out over the release of the sixth film, i decided to devote a post to the books that have, oddly enough, formed much of the foundations of my view on life:

1. Harry Potter and the Sorcerer's [Philosopher's] Stone

the writing for this one - style-wise, at least - isn't particularly special. the pacing for the beginning of the book is a little uneven, and often jerks around to capture somewhat miniscule - but magical and entertaining - aspects of the magical universe, and glossing over potentially significant events and tilts.

i picked the book up reluctantly, after a friend of mine urged me to put down my typical historical fiction and try something new and, in their words, "awwesoommmee."

i was under the impression that it was, as other people said, a kid's book.

and, again, the beginning part - though it managed to grab a little bit of my attention - didn't do much to impress.

but i remember the exact moment/passage that made me fall in love with the series forever.

the chapter about The Mirror of Erised, even to this day, manages to touch me more than a great deal of other books i've read.

here was this young wizard who was blessed with all of the gifts and vices of the typical mythical hero: he was an orphan who was brought up in a place to which he didn't belong; he unknowingly possessed other-worldly power; he knew nothing of his past until cues eventually came along to direct him; he was given a task that he alone had to complete; he was a reluctant hero who accepted his destiny and ultimately reigned victorious.

he could do magic, and finally existed in a world where magic was not only spectacle, but also commonplace (which, really, added to the real "wonder" of Rowling's universe).

more importantly, he could do magic, and had been through overwhelming strife the likes of which no one should have to suffer, and all he wanted was something as human and as real and as simple (to grasp, at least) as love. unconditional love.

it was the Erised scene, i think, that really set the tone and theme for the entire series.

and that made me, admittedly, a little misty-eyed.

and, again, made me fall in love.

2. Harry Potter and the Chamber of Secrets

if i had to choose a book to be omitted from the series - as much as i love all of the books - it would have to be this one.

which is strange for me to admit, as, shortly after reading it, it was one of my favorite books for a little while.

not that it didn't have its merits.

if the first book set the overall theme (of the power of love in the balance of good and evil), the second book managed to really ground Rowling's humor as a running tone and style in the series.

moreover, it worked to put in a few more subtle hints and strengthen the relationships of the characters with one another.

only in its second year, the characters have already started to grow and evolve.

and the story begins to really begin its discussion about death, and therefore starts to get darker.

reading this one, mainly because of the Chamber scene, made me feel a little grown up, because you get the sense of impending doom and danger, and the feeling that it might be a little too grown-up for kids.

3. Harry Potter and the Prisoner of Azkaban

when people ask, “yeah, but…which one’s your favorite?” this is the usually the one i start to talk about.

many of the people i’ve talked to claim that this is one of their lesser favorite ones, and that only the last three or four of the series are really worth noting, because the story finally starts to take shape.

but i disagree.

the third book is where we finally see Harry begin to battle his inner demon, at no better a time than when he hits the typical age of raging hormones, angst, loneliness, and fear.

it’s a much darker, more significant turn than its predecessors.

there isn’t as much action – Voldemort’s presence is made only by mention, and he seems to be more or less absent from the deepest themes of the book - but, to me at least, it was always much scarier and much more suspenseful than the first two.

inner demons and fear (of fear, itself) can be just as chilling as basilisks and death.

boggarts, simply enough, represent our worst fears, and force us to depend on our sense of humor – or our ability to see the light in everything – to conquer those fears.

the dementors, really, are more than just creepy hooded things with bad skin (honestly, we see enough of those at Hot Topic); their power lies in the idea that they bring about the very things we deeply fear, regret, and repress, just so we can manage from day to day.

they force us to relive the very dark parts of ourselves that normally go unnoticed, hidden away or staunched by our need for hope and our capacity for love.

the Patronus Charm is unique to the person who conjures it because we each rely on different sources of hope, happiness, and love: just as the power of the dementor varies with each person because each of us holds different fears and traumas.

so this one, i think, resonates so deeply because it’s so much more personal. you learn, through Harry, not to fear single entities of being (that is, Voldemort).

you learn that there are scarier things, within yourself, that often go overlooked or left alone and ignored.

you really appreciate how much Rowling understands (and must remember) the shittiness of the growing up process, and all of the mixed emotions and fears that go along with it.

the magic is still fantastic, but the feelings and overall theme are grounded in reality.

you really begin to connect with all of the characters, especially Harry, and, maybe, a little bit of yourself.

and that's the real magic of Harry Potter.

the power of fear that can only be overcome by love.

the books that always force me to look a little bit closer at myself and teach without really lecturing are the ones that i tend to favor.

lastly, this is the one where the tone of the series makes the final shift into darkness, where all of the pieces (with the Marauders and Snape and Lily) start to take shape and fall into place.

from here on out it's a real journey, and Harry really starts to mature.

and it came at a perfect time, and was perfectly captured.